45 Minutes

I keep reading that exercise is important. It’s true exercise helps me to focus. I enjoy intense physical activity. Pushing my body to physical or mental limits is fun. The best fun ever.
The Internets recommends a basic walk to help me focus.
For funsies I’m posting below without censoring any words my focus thoughts during a 45 minute walk.
My stomach hurts.
Maybe I should go back home and eat something first.
Nah. It’s not that bad.
Just saw a cat try to take down a bird without success. Nice try pussy.
I can’t believe people still burn their leaves. There has got to be a better way to get rid of them.
Fuck. Rock in my shoe.
Ow.
Ow.
Ow.
Okay. No more rock.
It’s just that burning leaves stinks so bad. Worst fall smell ever. And all the smoke can’t be good for the environment.
I get why people want to get rid of their leaves. They make ugly stains on the roads, sidewalks, and driveways. Plus, they are dangerous in the winter when the rain freezes. It’s somehow extra slippery where they are on the ground. And they get tracked in the house if you don’t rake them up.
They sure are pretty though. I love the sound they make when you walk on them. It’s all loud and rewarding. Classic fall sound.
I seriously can’t believe my leg still hurts from that pole fit class. Get it together thigh. That was two days ago. Stop being a fucking cry baby.
My hands are cold. I wish I was wearing some fingerless gloves. Too bad they are dirty and I couldn’t find them.
Strictly Ballroom is on Nexflix. I should watch that later and see if it’s as good as I remember. I’m sure it is though. Baz Luhrmann is a master(bater)!
Sigh.
Has it been 45 minutes yet? I’m tired and cold. I have to pee. I could eat. My leg hurts. This walk can suck it.
I just checked. It’s been 30 minutes. That’s not so bad. I could walk for 15 more minutes.
Hopefully my fingers won’t fall off from the cold.
My back hurts.
Squirrel.
My sister hates squirrels. When we were little she used to say squirrels made her thumbs hurt. It always makes me giggle every time I think about it. It’s just so weird and adorable.
13 minutes left. Fuck.
Gonna walk down this here alley. Fuck you right leg. How do you like these rocks? Stupid bitch leg. Suck on rocks you dumb dickless whiner.
What up with the ladder against the tree? That looks funny. I’m going to take a picture.

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Ugh. For fucks sake. Really? Another rock in my shoe? Son of a bitch.
8 minutes left. So close.
Two squirrels. I bet they cuddle when they go to bed in their tree house. For warmth. Because it is fucking cold at night and I doubt their tree house has heating. Or plumbing. No judgement.
Four minutes.
There is this lady at my new job and every time she sighs I want to punch her in her face. She just sighs too much and too emotionally. I get it. You’re bored. Or tired. Or both at the same time. Please stop with all the sighs. I hate you when you sigh like that.
Three minutes.
Dang.
I am so over this. It’s stupid. And lame. I’m hungry and I’m going home.

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